I don’t really have much to say this week so I’ll promote other stuff I’m doing on the website.
Do you want to hear me talk about running and fitness? You should listen to my podcast “We Run This.”
Do you want to hear me make jokes with professional wrestlers? You should listen to my podcast “Not About Wrestling.”
That’s all I’ve got.
Here are some of the funniest parenting tweets and memes from dads this week.
Me: How was school?
6-year-old: There was a fire drill. It was boring.
Me: Why?
6: There's never a real fire.
So disappointing.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 8, 2020
https://twitter.com/WeedlordKrillin/status/1314541099218853888
https://twitter.com/CrockettForReal/status/1314320494162661376
Whoever said “There is no such thing as a stupid question” has never heard me ask about Groupons at a college financial aid seminar.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) October 9, 2020
https://www.instagram.com/p/CGEHDgIpE3-/
https://twitter.com/joshdemaree/status/1313845096996110336
Confession: I tried sugar-free barbecue sauce. Please forgive this momentary lapse in judgement.
— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) September 27, 2020
I feel this in my very soul as I take each of my kids through math right now. pic.twitter.com/FeOSf9loIY
— Shannon Carpenter (@HossmanAtHome) October 8, 2020
If you’re trying to sell a used couch online, whatever you think it’s worth, it’s not.
— dADDisms (@Beagz) October 7, 2020
This woman just yelled at me for not wearing a mask and getting within six feet of her.
I replied: “But this is my bed and we’re married.”
— Dad Bits (@DadBits) October 9, 2020
6-year-old: I want to be your Assistant Boss.
Me: I don’t think so.
6: I can do it. I can get you drinks and food.
Me: Well, that would be Assistant To The Boss.
6: I want to be Assistant To The Boss!
— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) October 4, 2020
My wife said we would save money on Halloween candy if we bought it at Aldi so I guess we're handing out Twicks, Skattles, and 4 Musketeers.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 8, 2020
***