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Halloween as an adult is much different than it was as a kid. Instead of donning your favorite superhero outfit and sprinting through the nearest affluent neighborhood in search of the year’s best candy haul, the holiday is an excuse to get dressed up as a creative pop culture reference and get drunk with your friends. The maturation of All Hallow’s Eve may not be a bad thing, but it takes some of the allure of the highly-marketed sugar rush. For this Nashville man, however, Oct. 31 was still about ingesting as much sweet, sour and chocolatey goodness as possible— though his night was more trick than treat.
So @MatthewCUnger and I set out Halloween candy for the neighborhood kids last night while we were on the road for the game.
Then this grown man drove up and stole it all. CMON MAN! 😒😑🤣 pic.twitter.com/fxtxzH8a4R
— Nate Bain (@natebain) November 2, 2020
The video is funny, yes, but the move itself is that of an insane person and raises so many questions…
Who is he? What inspired the idea? Was this guy driving around Tennessee stealing candy off of unsuspecting porches all night? Are Ring doorbells a concept for which he is not familiar? Was he by himself? If he wasn’t, why is he driving own get away car? Who was he with? Did he have to take the bowl? What did he do with the candy after he stole it? Did he eat all of that candy in one sitting? What if it wasn’t the type of candy that he wanted? Was it thrown away? Does he know that Halloween candy goes on sale for, like, 50 percent off in less than 12 hours? Is this easier than going to Walmart?
We need these answers, and this guy needs to be found because most importantly…
WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN?!