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I have a theory that hell is just the middle seat of a trans-continental flight while the person to your right is obese and the guy on your left has a sinus infection. Add a leftover tuna sub to the mix and I wouldn’t wish that circumstance on my worst enemy.
The middle seat is the Cooper Manning of seating options. Most of the time, I just oscillate from having a panic attack bred out of claustrophobia to having a panic attack about the possibility of my neighbors striking up a conversation with me at my most vulnerable moment.
There are near zero liberties of being the sandwich filling, but the silver lining is that some accept that both the left and right arm rests belong to the person in the middle.
The Rich Eisen Show conducted a poll to determine who actually believes this and who just wants to watch the world burn.
does the person sitting in the middle seat on airplane get both armrests?
— Rich Eisen Show (@RichEisenShow) June 6, 2019
It appears that nearly 50,000 people wouldn’t piss on the middle seater if he were on fire.
50,000 of these guys.
What’s your plane armrest elbow etiquette? Asking for a friend.
(Not asking for a friend – totally asking for myself… mid-flight). 🤔 pic.twitter.com/J5nT26qcHI
— Liam McKinnon (@liammckinnon) June 2, 2019
The people advocating for middle seat rights argued their case.
Yes. Plane etiquette rules are as follows: Left Seat: aisle with extra leg space and left armrest. Middle Seat: Both armrests. Window Seat: Window and place to lean against and right armrest. We are a society of rules, not animals.
— Dylan (@dconn91) June 6, 2019
https://twitter.com/CraZDiamond/status/1136738648227950592
https://twitter.com/seanmpatton/status/1136732506521329664
https://twitter.com/theMaysShow29/status/1136743716851372033
https://twitter.com/turnislefthome/status/1136981101673680897
Some weren’t as humane.
https://twitter.com/jenhunstunbun/status/1136899293137313792
Nope pic.twitter.com/JUV0HTjM4u
— Eric S. Martinez (@TheEricMartinez) June 6, 2019
They get whichever fucking armrest they get to first. If that's both, then so be it, I'll lean on the tray table.
— Dean, a fox 🦊 (@ScrawnyFox) June 7, 2019
https://twitter.com/lukeywebo/status/1136971475750010880
Life hack: Pop a xanax and suck down a Bloody Mary and you’d be fine if they put you on the fucking wing.