The Pool Boy Says Jerry Falwell Told Him To ‘Go For It’ With His Wife

The Jerry/Becki Falwell/Pool Boy love triangle gained some clarity today, as the pool boy (Giancarlo Granda, but we’re ALWAYS going to call him the pool boy) went on Good Morning America to tell his version:

What a fantastic young man. What a handsome, articulate, well-mannered former pool boy. If he isn’t the personification of the American dream, well, I never. The blue collar pool boy, working at a fancy Miami hotel to pay his way through college, receives an offer for sex from some older woman (with a few curveballs attached), OBLIGES, and ends up on Good Morning America with his perfect hair and his chiseled jawline?! Good on ya, buddy.

Here’s my question: if you’re a pool boy, are you aware that at some point in the job, you may have to fuck an older woman? Like is that just an occupational hazard? Day one of the job, does your boss explain your duties and say, “always make sure you check the pH balance, clean the filters, maintain a steady water level, and… am I forgetting anything? OH yeah, you might have to bone a middle-aged woman if she asks.” At this point, this story is such a joke, such a ridiculous cliché, that it doesn’t even seem real.

But it is. We hope. God, let it be real.

For what it’s worth, who cares if Jerry Falwell likes to watch? If that’s their thing, and they’re both on board, great. None of my business. No victims here. I suppose if you subscribe to some Christian belief of purity and not having sex outside of your marriage, then maybe you’ll find this hypocritical. But I say whatever you do in the privacy of your own Miami hotel room, and for years afterwards, is your business.

UPDATE: Becki might have also hooked up with a Liberty University band student, according to a story in the Daily Mail. It’s early yet, but we’ll keep you posted…