Aliens are coming. They are perhaps just over the milky horizon, light years away, and we’ll know precisely where sometime within the next decade, according to scientists. But are these extraterrestrials out there with peaceful intentions, or do they eventually plan to swoop down to Earth with all guns blazing? Nobody knows. All we can tell you is our military is standing at the ready, even though they understand that there is no way in Hell they’ll ever be a match for an uncivilization of technologically advanced space hooligans. In reality, if and when aliens finally do materialize on this rotten planet, there’ll be nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, and those sad sacks on a mad rampage to stock up on things like toilet paper will be among the first to be vaporized. If we don’t find some way to prepare for the possibility of a savage invasion, our chances of becoming slaves to a beast name SuvwI’ increase by the second.
So consider this a warning, America.
The SETI Institute, a non-profit corporation dedicated to sniffing out extraterrestrial activity, says that while the world may not suffer the wrath of an alien attack anytime soon, that doesn’t mean we won’t confirm the existence of the otherworldly in the near future. SETI astronomer and astrophysicist Seth Shostak recently toldThe Debrief that the group would discover an alien civilization in fifteen years. If not, he’ll buy you a cup of coffee. “SETI doubles in speed roughly every two years because the speed is largely dependent on computers,” he said. “So just follow Moore’s Law, and you know, I bet everybody a cup of Starbucks that we’ll find something by 2036.”
What makes it possible that they’ll actually track down alien life is that highly sophisticated computer systems are doing all of the work. Many people think that SETI is just a bunch of stoner nerds hanging out and listening to radio signals from space, but that doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of its approach.
The organization has a vast network of computers that becomes more efficient in finding interstellar signals with each passing minute. “We don’t sit in front of the computers and look at the data. That would be kind of like watching millions of TV channels at the same time,” Shostak explained of the operation.
But SETI is kind of dull considering that it is all about transmitting and receiving radio signals. If you ask them, there could be an alien civilization out there that has already warned Earth that they are coming for us tooth and nail. But because those signals would take light years to reach the planet, we might not hear them coming. But then again, maybe we’ve already been infiltrated. Perhaps aliens have been here for a long time. Not only have there been reports of UFOs and bizarre alien occurrences since the 1600s, but there have also been more UFO sightings in 2020 than ever before. Even the U.S. Department of Defense admits to being in possession of otherworldly spacecraft. So, why haven’t little green creatures made contact with us? One Russian scientist believes it’s because Earth and all of its inhabitants are just a giant alien experiment. We are under their microscope for one reason or another. And they don’t want to intervene in any of our lunacy because it might mean the undoing of their grand design. Yes, their design. Like, the aliens – whatever that means — could be God.
It might sound crazy, but is it really? Humans like to believe in a higher power, even though there isn’t any evidence that one exists. But the concept of aliens is too far out there for most. In fact, some of the latest polls show the population is pretty much split down the middle on whether or not they believe in aliens. The naysayers are presumably those who refuse to believe in any story that doesn’t appear in the Bible. But believing in God and the ethos of traditional religions is on its way out, according to Diana Pasulka, professor of religious studies at the University of North Carolina. She thinks that aliens will become a new religion for that tribe of people disheartened by the disingenuousness of the second coming.
“A lot of people see disaster on the horizon, and there’s a deep fear that we won’t be able to save ourselves,” she said in a 2019 interview with Vox. “So what will save us? Well, for some, it will be these advanced beings who come to us and tell us what we can do or how we can escape.”
All of this might be difficult to stomach. But if SETI is right, humanity still has several more years to get right with its maker. However, it is possible that by the time we finally have a grip on all of this alien business, it might be too late. Suppose next year is anything like this one. In that case, our civilization runs the risk of being pushed over the edge of apocalyptic decline, leaving us no other option but to sink further into chaos and disorder. No new president can save us from this time of reckoning. Right before his death, renowned scientist Stephen Hawking predicted we would get our asses handed to us within the next 100 years or so. Maybe he was onto something.