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In case you just finally dragged yourself out of bed, one of the big stories today on the Internet is the fact that former presidential candidate Ted Cruz appeared to have liked a very NSFW tweet overnight.
Yes, this IS why the Internet was invented.
Somewhat surprisingly it took the Texas senator longer than one would have expected to reply to this interesting turn of events.
His senior communications advisor, Catherine Frazier tweeted in the middle of the night that the “offensive tweet posted on @tedcruz account earlier has been removed by staff and reported to Twitter,” but who the hell follows her? We wanted to hear from the man himself. Was he really enjoying a little spank time and just got busted or no?
Turns out, at least according to him, it was a “staffing issue.” Seriously.
Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Tex.) says that “a staffing issue” led to his official Twitter account “liking” a pornographic image overnight.
— Ed O'Keefe (@edokeefe) September 12, 2017
Cruz told reporters: “there are a number of people on the team who have access to the account."
— Ed O'Keefe (@edokeefe) September 12, 2017
CRUZ: "It appears that someone inadvertently hit the ‘like’ button and when we discovered the post… we pulled it down.”
— Ed O'Keefe (@edokeefe) September 12, 2017
MORE CRUZ: “We’re dealing with it internally but it was a mistake, it was not malicious conduct.”
— Ed O'Keefe (@edokeefe) September 12, 2017
Cruz wouldn't name the staffer; nor what discipline they might face; it is “still being discussed” whether person will access the account.
— Ed O'Keefe (@edokeefe) September 12, 2017
If no one gets publicly punished then it was totally Cruz, right?
Cruz quips: If he'd known it would trend so quickly, "perhaps we should have posted something like this during the Indiana primary.”
— Ed O'Keefe (@edokeefe) September 12, 2017
Wouldn’t have been any worse than some of the things the current President did.
Naturally, calling the embarrassing liking of a porn tweet a “staffing issue” was pretty much like setting himself up on a tee when came to the Twitter responses…
https://twitter.com/dganstine/status/907618966993956866
You can't make this stuff up 😂https://t.co/M23Khxi4Ym pic.twitter.com/hQcfXfiA6c
— Enes Banter (@EnesBanter) September 12, 2017
He said "staffing issue" heh heh heh. pic.twitter.com/eZXVg3DyFV
— Anna America (@annaamerica) September 12, 2017
https://twitter.com/AnkletLady/status/907619207457652738
https://twitter.com/MrsSheaWong/status/907644876644405250
"Staffing issue" pic.twitter.com/NQ647F4ajB
— mcbc 🇺🇸🗽 (@mcbc) September 12, 2017
https://twitter.com/MattRGate/status/907618942834827264
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
— Sara Ganey (@sarag229) September 12, 2017
"Staffing Issue" was the porn he wanked to the day before.
— Oscar (@CrankyMiddleAge) September 12, 2017
Yeah mate, I've had similar "staffing issues" nudge nudge wink wink
— Tim Deadman (@DadBloke) September 12, 2017
https://twitter.com/jacob_clapper/status/907619720278540290
https://twitter.com/LiamXFawks/status/907635511753428993
https://twitter.com/Dave_Fox/status/907623203236847616
Annnnd we have a winner.
(But really, it just goes on and on and on and every one of them is hilarious.)