The Tribe Has Spoken: Stock Challenge Week 1 Review

Hey there Wall Street Survivors.

We’re just a week into The Water Coolest Stock (er, Stonk) Market Challenge (BTW, you can still join for a chance to win a share of $2k in prizes) and it’s all but over for some of you (losing 60% 👀). How bad have some of your trades been? Here is a list of things that have gone better than your trades …

– Facebook’s privacy policy
– Governance at WeWork
– The reliability of PG&E’s power lines

Shall I continue?

The good news is that not everyone’s virtual brokerage account is further in the red than Enron circa 2007.

Like LuisLemons who has returned nearly 51%. Luis, if you’re reading this, just know that the virtual SEC is watching you.

Since we aren’t in the business of divulging (virtual) white-collar criminal’s secrets we won’t list his market moves, but let’s take a look back at the week that was, shall we?

Look back at it …

We’re on the back nine of earnings season but that doesn’t mean there weren’t some juicy trades to be made …

Boeing (BA): Welp, the few brave souls who liked what they saw from Boeing’s CEO Dennis Muilenburg on C-SPAN (read: his two days in the hot seat on Capitol Hill) were rewarded on Monday when news broke that Denny Jetplanes would forgo his bonus for the year. Shares spiked 2.6% on the news.

Disney (DIS): Ya’ll need to grow up … 3% of participants owned Disney heading into earnings on Wednesday. Of course, you were rewarded after hours on news that Bob Iger & Co. beat profit estimates and managed to get everyone all hot and bothered about Disney+.

S&P 500 (SPY): If you were long literally ANYTHING (except crypto) at the end of this week and didn’t make money, congratulations, it’s a modern-day financial miracle. And if you were a bear last week, well, it can’t get much worse … right?

The week ahead …

We’ve got a few major earnings (we see you Walmart) on the docket, but the big thing to watch is, what else, trade war drama. Tuesday we get POTUS speaking at the Economic Club of NY where we can only assume we’ll get some clues as to WTF is going on with this phase 1 deal.

And on Wednesday we get Jerry Interest Rates (Jay Powell) chatting up a few different Congressional Committees. Maybe we’ll get some hint as to what the Feds next move will be? Wishful thinking …

Happy trading, Survivors.

And make sure to tell your friends, family and annoying coworkers about our stonk market game. It’s the most fun you can have with your clothes on (or off … who are we to judge?)

The Water Coolest is a daily business newsletter consisting of business news, financial advice, and unfiltered commentary. Delivered fresh in your inbox every morning so you're ready to snap necks and cash checks. Written by Tyler Morrin, AJ Glagolev, Nick Ellis, and Ian Barto.