Ukraine Prisons Now Offering ‘Luxury’ Cells To VIP Prisoners – For A Price

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Crime doesn’t pay, unless you’re a wealthy crook in Ukraine, were your bigger bank account could nab a nice prison cell for a while.

The country’s Justice Ministry is now offering non-refundable gift certificates for “luxury cells.”

According to the BBC, Justice Minister Denys Malyuska called the gift certificates “potential birthday present for officials and politicians.”

The upgrade is only available for pre-trial detention facilities and to prisoners awaiting sentencing and presumed innocent. The certificates also expire after six months.

“It is client-oriented,” Malyuska joked because “it included three meals a day, 24-hour security, and reduced chances of contracting COVID-19” and “guests” of the state can choose which prison they want to be confined to.

This offer isn’t available to criminals found guilty.

Here’s a quick look at these “luxury” accommodations.

More photos are available on the BBC website.

While Malyuska is boasting about the certificate idea, critics are slamming him by saying the initiative is cynical.

Former MP Boryslav Bereza feels Malyuska has turned Ukraine into a “laughing stock.”

“If Mr. Troll, the minister of justice, talks about gift certificates for comfortable conditions in remand centers and that’s OK, then I get the impression that we have all lost our minds.”

Malyuska explained the reason behind the luxury cell offers is to benefit other prisoners.

The money collected goes directly to a special fund used to improve conditions in regular cells which are “notoriously dire” in the country.

[via BBC]

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Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.