Public displays of affection: no one wants to see them, be near them or even do them unless they’ve got a naggy girlfriend who won’t shut the fuck up about how you never hold her hand anymore.
But with any rule there are exceptions, which in this case is Tom Hiddleston and Taylor Swift’s barftastic relationship and the photos they took at Swift’s 4th of July party:
https://www.instagram.com/p/BHfbTikDYx5/?taken-by=britmaack&hl=en
…well, “photo.”
Technically only this photo is making people on Twitter lose their shit, and it’s not because Hiddleston and Swift are T-.005 seconds from making out. Take a closer look at Ryan Reynold’s face. “Why am I here?” he questions himself as Blake pervishly creeps on Swiddleston, “I would much rather be literally anywhere else right now. Literally. I would list Rwanda and Somalia as preferable locations over this chair, in the middle of two couples taking a photo just for the sake of pandering for Instagram likes. Kill me.”
It’s okay Ryan, Twitter understands your pain too:
Could Ryan Reynolds look more bored if he tried…?! pic.twitter.com/FFYTYVZDeB
— R1 Breakfast with Nick Grimshaw 2012-2018 (@R1Breakfast) July 6, 2016
https://twitter.com/coucouaaron/status/750554270500610054
Ryan Reynolds face is EVERYTHING 😂 #TomHiddleston #2016IsCRAZY pic.twitter.com/cXEW6HVShl
— BeatlesFass (@BeatFassbender) July 5, 2016
https://twitter.com/CynDrew/status/750688118626451456
https://twitter.com/Bxkii/status/750683065014480896
Ryan Reynolds i want to go home pic.twitter.com/guio4gUZce
— Funny Tweets (@FunnyThingsUK) July 6, 2016
based on this pic, Ryan Reynolds should be Bond; only one with sufficient testosterone to look uncomfortable #freeryanreynolds
— @Baldwhinger – unacceptable views (@JMC_Starbug) July 6, 2016
Ryan Reynolds looks like he's trying to decide the best way to escape https://t.co/FiFEhJMinL
— Baby Theranos (@clumsybitchbaby) July 6, 2016
Ryan Reynolds: Fvck this sh1t! pic.twitter.com/prF6cA3x9h
— Dhnt (@fathale) July 6, 2016
https://twitter.com/CathsTake/status/750678191690354689
The @DailyMailUK's snapchat is amazing today. Ryan Reynolds is all of us. pic.twitter.com/GXbhH9rKGM
— Shupette (@Shupette) July 6, 2016
https://twitter.com/CMaeTay/status/750675832444579846
https://twitter.com/CMaeTay/status/750676109113430016
https://twitter.com/chriztineb/status/750675756418736128
Fortunately for humanity’s sake, Reynolds and Lively were able to escape the party with their sanity intact. As for Hiddleston and Swift…eh. I give it another two months, tops.