Nature sex is the best sex. I am completely qualified to say this because I’ve had sexual intercourse WITH A GIRL during a hike on the Appalachian Trail. Hold up, let me pump my own tires.
Anyhoo, the raw primitiveness of slapping skins outdoors adds a flair that made me forget that a scorpion crawled into my buttcrack. I’m pretty sure I smeared berry juice on my face and started banging my chest like Tarzan. I was choking on a bug.
Bottom line is that having to deal with red ants nipping at your family jewels is enough to worry about, add a webcam filming your uninspired thrusting and your willy has about as much of a chance at standing up as Steven Hawking does on a surfboard.
That’s why I commend the Brazilian couple who didn’t stop doing the old horizontal bop after being sniped by the webcam of a paraglider looking to land his glorified kite.
Check out the footage below.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0qM8LZE_14
According to LADbible, the paragliding snitch just had to play buzz kill. Says Brazilian Police chief Cesar Luiz Danuns:
“I began to receive calls and text messages on my mobile phone to say there was a couple having sex and I sent a patrol car to go and investigate.They were asked to stop and did so without saying a word. They were asked to put their clothes on before being taken to the station.”
No one likes a snitch.