Let’s for a quick second ignore the factual evidence presented to us that almost all Disney princesses are somewhere between the ages of 14-17 and pretend, just pretend for a second, that they are actually of legal age.
Okay. We are now all of the idea that what I’m about to say is perfectly okay, given that, for the moment, all Disney animated princesses are above the age of 18.
Here we go.
Disney princesses are hot. Real hot. Red-headed and fierce Ariel. Stunning Snow White. Gorgeous yet sexually repressed Cinderella. They’re all hot. I would sleep with every Disney princess if they were real.
But the beauty of them all is Belle. Look at her here.
Come on, son. You gonna look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want a slice of that? I doubt Belle could ever get any hotter. Except she will, for she is about to be played in an upcoming, real people movie version of Beauty and the Beast by the love of all our lives, Emma Watson.
Yep, Emma Watson in beautiful Belle ballgowns. Look me in the eye and tell me you wouldn’t masturbate to that image. Well, I would hope not because you will see this in a theater and are not Pee Wee Herman. But when it comes out on DVD. Oh yea.
Emma released the info via Facebook:
I’m finally able to tell you…that I will be playing Belle in Disney’s new live-action Beauty and the Beast! It was such a big part of my growing up, it almost feels surreal that I’ll get to dance to ‘Be Our Guest’ and sing ‘Something There’. My six year old self is on the ceiling—heart bursting. Time to start some singing lessons … I can’t wait for you to see it.”
We can’t wait either. Damn this is gonna be hot.
The role of Beast will be played by my dick.