Jessica Simpson Nearly Got A Breast Reduction, Let’s Look At All The Extremely Ample Reasons That Was A Prudent Decision Not To

In the September issue of Women’s Health, Jessica Simpson revealed that she nearly got a breast reduction.

“I thought I was going to get a breast reduction, but after having kids, I look at myself and I’m like, you know what, my boobs are actually really big, but I like how they are. They’re an asset, and Eric [Johnson, her husband] loves them still.”

“My boobs just have their own life,” the voluptuous Simpson said. “They have a way of making themselves present.”

Jessica was given this otherworldly gifts and then she wants to toss them in the trash?

Simpson nearly spit in Mother Nature’s face, then pulled down her daisy dukes, and took a steamy hot, double-tapered shit right in her mouth.

Here is definitive photographic evidence that Jessica Simpson made the correct decision to not rid herself and the world of the endowments that the gods bestowed upon her.

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via GIPHY

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via GIPHY

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via GIPHY