Chick Uses Social Media To Try To Track Down A Dude She Met At The Bar And Let’s All Watch This Go Poorly

Nothing worse than looking at a called strike three at the bar. No swings, no hits. Can’t count how many times I left a bar with my shriveled dick tucked between my legs kicking myself for not approaching the girl who was eye fucking me from across the bar. Ok, she was eye fucking the dude behind me, but he left, so she’d have to make a call to the bullpen. That relief pitcher could have been me. If I wasn’t a gargantuan beta male.

But what happens when you get someone’s number from the bar and “write it down wrong?” A rational person would immediately jump to the conclusion that the person was clowning them.

But not Pippa McKinney.

The 22-year-old from England posted an innocent Facebook post attempting to find the hunk she met at the bar the night before. The post has garnered almost 14,000 likes and 2,000 shares. And you’ll see why.

Our English blokes over at LADbible took the liberty of splicing the essential comments to adequately tell the story.

Damn, I don’t even want my mom to know who I’m seeing, nevermind request thousands of my Facebook friends to find my potential suitor. Aggressive. But I respect it.

Her friends see to be just *SoOoO SuPpOrTiVe*

Pipps starts losing that loving feeling.

Is ‘cunt’ a word that’s used freely in England?? There are an infinite number of words Pipp could have used to describe her feelings.

Pipp, you thought you felt like a cunt before. How bout when his girlfriend gets tagged in the comments?

The tides are turning…

Pipp is starting to believe that love is a human construct and nothing matters and we all die alone. Poor Pipp.

Pipps makes it clear that she wants a man who IS NOT a cheat, bros.

Wait. For. It…

Pippa thought this would be an appropriate time to take the conversation private, which we will make public.

Can’t get much lower for my boy Matty Steven. Oh wait, nevermind. He’s becoming a meme.

This is why I plan to stay single my entire life. Answer to nobody. Become nobody’s meme. Masturbate excessively. The life, bro. The life.

[h/t LADbible]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.