Chipotle Just Closed 43 Stores Because Of Reported Violent, Bloody Diarrhea :)

I have a couple minor qualms with Chipotle before I break into the story about how at least 22 people across Oregon in Washington state have gotten bloody, violent, unforgiving diarrhea due to the Mexican food chain. Qualm #1: Just melt the fucking cheese. Qualm #2: Tell me you’re out of carnitas one more time. I dare you. Qualm #3: Remind me guac is extra again. Come on just say it. You won’t. Ya, that’s what I thought. Qualm #4: stop making shit my pants.

Ok, now that my demons are out in the open, let’s get to the story.

At least 43 stores across Oregon and Washington had to be closed due to at least 22 people ending up with symptoms of E.coli, eight of which had to be hospitalized.

According to CNN,

Infections with Escherichia coli can cause severe stomach cramps, vomiting and diarrhea which is often bloody. Fever is usually low, if at all present, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Infections can range from mild to life-threatening.

The source of contamination has yet to be exactly determined, the department said, but 19 cases in Washington and three cases in Oregon have been linked to a handful of locations of the Mexican-themed restaurant chain.

“We immediately closed all of our restaurants in the area out of an abundance of caution, even though the vast majority of these restaurants have no reported problems,” said Chipotle spokesman Chris Arnold in a statement.

Regadless, I think I’ll go Qdoba tonight, thanks.

[h/t CNN]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.