Life

Pharma Douche Martin Shkreli Attempts To Improve His Image By Resurrecting Harambe The Fallen Gorilla

#Harambe
by Last Updated


We’ve seen the internet go bananas for Harambe over recent weeks. College players are dedicating their season to the deceased gorilla. There is a petition to rename a United States warship to the USS Harambe. And we’ve seen Harambe taking away votes from Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump for President of the United States. So we’ve seen that the ghost of Harambe is practically capable of anything. But can Harambe achieve the impossible? Can Harambe transform pharma douche Martin Shkreli from the “most hated man in America” to the most beloved man in America?

That sounds like an impossible task, but if Shkreli was ever able to resurrect Harambe the almighty that would go far in redemption for his nefarious ways.

Surprisingly, many people thought Shkreli’s plans to bring back a gorilla from the dead was a ludicrous idea and merely a publicity stunt to garner attention for the morally bankrupt pharmaceutical executive. Shkreli suggested that people stop whipping their dicks out for Harambe and help him bring Harambe back to life.

Then Shkreli proposed merging himself with Harambe, which to me sounds goddamn sacrilegious and desecrating the once great Silverback gorilla.

The underhanded and scheming pharma douche showed his true colors and even threatened to shoot and kill the revived Harambe. Again.

We can’t forget that Shkreli jokingly admitted to killing Harambe.

But in the end it’s all about Martin Shkreli, as he makes promises he can’t keep if he is elected President of the United States in 2020.

Don’t be fooled people, Martin Shkreli doesn’t give a goddamn rabbit turd about the powerful and adored Harambe.

#DicksOutForHarambe

How Martin Shkreli Went From Business Villain To Comic Book Supervillain


[DailyDot]