Never Shoved A Potato In Your Vagina To Prevent Pregnancies? You’re Smarter Than This Girl

A 22-year-old Colombian woman (whose name has been withheld because, man, you would never recover from this one), was hospitalized recently with intense abdominal pain.

The cause of the discomfort? The potato she had placed inside her vagina.

‘What?!?!” you say.

Yep. The potato she had placed inside her vagina.

It wasn’t a problem at first, you see, the potato chilling there. In fact, it had been sitting there just fine for a couple weeks.

But the tuber began growing roots, probably enjoying the warm, moist conditions that is the inside of a woman’s vagina.

The protrusions, the roots poking and digging at her insides from her inside, hurt. That’s when she went to the doctor.

Per Colombia Reports, the potato was removed without requiring surgery. The anonymous lady is expected to make a full recovery.

And that’s that.

Oh. Why did she have the potato in her vagina? Ancient South American superstitions is all.

“My mom told me that if I didn’t want to get pregnant, I should put a potato up there, and I believed her.” 

Well, I imagine if you cut it in half, and put it in cut side out, that could act as a diaphragm. With the potato flesh soaking up the semen.

But, condoms. They probably work better. Condoms definitely work better.