There’s nothing like gunning down an open stretch of road, straight cruising as you watch the speedometer climb and climb.
It’s a wonderful feeling, one that everyone should experience.
Bro scientists in Germany have found a way to extend that pleasure to our sperms. Instead of them lazily bouncing into uterine linings and getting lost plodding through the vaginal canal, you can now pop a motor onto their tails and send them screaming into ovums at 120 mph, smashing into egg cells with the velocity of a red-lining Ferrari.
Gives new meaning to wham, bam, thank you ma’am
Now a team of German researchers has invented a “spermbot” that can help sperm swim better to improve couples’ fertility, according to a study published recently in the journal Nano Letters. Ideally, this technique would also be less costly than other assisted reproductive technologies, which can cost thousands of dollars per round.
The invention is a small metal spiral that is just large enough to fit over the tail of the sperm but not so wide as to slip over its head. Using a rotating magnetic field, researchers can direct the spiral to an individual sperm, and then use it as a motor to drive the sperm next to the egg. The sperm can then fertilize the egg, and the micromotor can simply slip off the sperm.
I know you want to watch video of it.
And sure, this seems great, but what happens when one of these things gets stuck in a fertilized egg and deforms the FUCK out of your baby?
This is the second fertility invention out of Germany in two weeks, after the flippable vasectomy switch.
Germany. Bringing questionable things into the bedroom since last Wednesday. And also since last forever, because Germans are pervy like whoa.