Greatest Teacher Ever Gets In Trouble For Assigning Class Essay Asking ‘How Would You Kill Me If You Had The Chance?’

Everyone remembers that one school assignment that was actually fun to work on. Maybe it was a science project that involved a real working volcano that shot lava or a sex ed assignment involving a real working penis that shot…nevermind.

I’m almost positive the assignment didn’t involve an essay discussing the best way to kill a teacher.

A Montgomery County, Md., middle school teacher assigned her English students in four separate classes a story in which they had to describe how they would kill her — and the description had to include at least three gerunds, three infinitives and three participles.

The Kingsview Middle School teacher, Patricia Lorenzen, sent an apology late last year to parents and guardians of students in four of her English classes, saying that she thought the assignment would “be an engaging way to review grammar concepts,” but later, after complaints by parents, she realized that it was inappropriate. By then, however, some of the students had actually completed the assignment, though others did not. No student was penalized for failing to complete the assignment.

I would give anything, ANYTHING to read some of those essays. Especially the paper from the kid who’d been planning to kill her since the first day of school. He probably got extra points for writing it in his own blood.

[H/T: The Washington Post]

Chris Illuminati avatar
Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.