Donald Trump Celebrated Clinching The Republican Nomination By Housing The Most American Food Possible

Donald Trump Attends Petroleum Conference In North Dakota

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Today, Donald Trump became the first person since Dwight Eisenhower to win the presidential nomination for a major party without having ever held elected office before.

How did Trump celebrate reaching the magic number of 1,237 delegates?

By housing some god damn Mickey D’s.

That’s a Big Mac, some fries, and a Diet Coke.

Trump, who has an utterly astounding (almost impressive) ability to contradict himself with everything he does, can’t even post an Instagram of a meal (the most basic of actions) with tripping over his past words.

How? He fucked up his drink choice.

Well, we did once elect Taft, so maybe there is hope.

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