Tinder is a fantastic app. Not only does it provide you with potential fuck buddies like literally right down the street, it costs absolutely nothing to use.
While that’s unlikely to change, at a summit for the Forbes Under 30 (for cool, young people who are cool and good at tech), Tinder CEO Sean Rad said that by next month, the app will roll out a premium service. At a price.
Gotta make money to stay in the game. From Forbes:
Rad wouldn’t give … specifics but hinted that one of the new features will focus on travel and could help Tinder move into markets beyond dating. Currently location based, Tinder lets you swipe though an endless stream of photos of people looking to meet up — but only the city you’re currently in. The new premium service will likely let users break away from location limits and expand their Tinder reach.
“We are adding features users have been begging us for,” said Rad. “They will offer so much value we think users are willing to pay for them.”
What fucking pervs have been “begging” Tinder for the ability to FUCK from father away. “I’m missing out on so many Los Angeles hoes while I sit here at a meeting in New York,” said the dude you hate wearing a blazer. “I should be able to check out hoes back home even while I’m gone.”
Or worse, “I’m heading to Toronto in a week. Gotta line up some trim.”
No. I think everyone is fine with Tinder as it is. The app itself, besides the lack of monetization, is doing great, with over 15 million matches made each day.
But what else could douchebags want from Tinder? Something even more awful? Like enhanced business networking? Oh, you better fucking believe it.
Though the company again declined to discuss specifics on-record, they mentioned that business networking looks like a compelling market. LinkedIn provides a helpful way of organizing existing business contacts, but it’s not effective for sparking new relationships. Connection requests from strangers on the network are just as unwanted as those on Facebook, and, in my experience, more prevalent. Instead of swiping strangers based on attractiveness, Tinder users could swipe based on perceived networking value.
God, the modern world. It’s just …. *hangs self before finishing sentence.*