Adrian Peterson Had The Most Bullshit Excuse For Barfing On The Plane (And It Has Nothing To Do With Dip)
It was widely reported that prior to Sunday’s game over the Lions, Adrian Peterson yacked on after a “bumpy” flight to Detroit after swallowing a big ol’ wad of chew. Fox broadcaster Chris Myers reported it during the game’s broadcast and everyone was like ‘that’s gross, but probably not the grossest thing Peterson’s ever done.’
Actually…come to think of it, definitely not.
Peterson, instead of laughing it off and admitting that it was a bonehead move, conjured up the biggest pile of steaming horseshit lie I’ve heard since my drug dealer told me “this is the best shit I’ve smoked in a whilllle.”
His reasoning for tossing cookies: his kinda allergy, kinda not to shellfish.
Take it away, Adrian.
Most important thing I’ll tweet today: Adrian Peterson discussing his shrimp allergy on a call with Bears media pic.twitter.com/rBv7v52Ufq
— Kevin Fishbain (@kfishbain) October 28, 2015
I can’t wait for Adrian’s excuse about the next time he’s late for practice. My guess is ‘My unicorn sprained its ankle on the freeway.’