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Given that this here website is now quite big (shout out to us), I’m usually hesitant to take shots at people on this public forum. I’m a decent guy, I like to think of myself as someone who is above taking pops at public personalities for no reason other than the fact that it makes me laugh. After all, as the golden rule states, treat others how you would like to be treated.
But, folks, let me tell ya somethin’: ESPN Monday Night Football analyst Booger McFarland just makes it too damn difficult.
Every week, as I indulge in the saving grace that is Monday Night Football, I tell myself that I’m gonna cut Booger some slack, that I’m gonna let things slide. And every week, he gives me a reason not to — he gives me a reason to hop up on this here internet soapbox and scream to the heavens begging for ESPN to find new on-air talent.
Take last night in Mexico City, for example, where Booger was in peak Boogering form during the Kansas City Chiefs 24-17 victory over the Los Angeles Chargers. Just straight Boogered all over the place. In fact, Booger was so very Boogery that his senseless ramblings caught the attention of Pro Bowl Green Bay Packers wide receiver Davante Adams.
“Games in this league are lost more than they’re won” -Booger McFarland
— Davante Adams (@tae15adams) November 19, 2019
Fellow Pro Bowl wideout Stefon Diggs also took notice, saying ESPN may as well just toss him into the booth:
They might as well let me commentate
— DIGGS (@stefondiggs) November 19, 2019
Diggs lmaoooo
— chris long (@JOEL9ONE) November 19, 2019
Current and former NFL pros weren’t the only ones ragging on Booger, as average joes such as you and I also took the time to point out Booger’s seemingly perpetual ridiculousness:
Booger McFarland: "Maholmes needs to matriculate the ball down the field" pic.twitter.com/GVniG9pNB1
— stoop kiid (@stoopkiid93) November 19, 2019
Joe tessitore – "hes grabbing the back of his leg there.."
Booger McFarland – "Yeah that's the hamstring area" pic.twitter.com/I1dOey71ck
— Robert Boucher Jr (@BabyBlizo) November 19, 2019
“3rd and 12 for the chiefs”
Booger McFarland, “Chiefs need a a first down here.”
Expert analysis, thank you. My football knowledge is now greater!
— Mario 🦅 (@ArrequinMario) November 19, 2019
“Look for the screen pass here!” As Mahomes chucks it 40yds downfield…Booger McFarland is no Romo
— Shawn Vogler (@VoglerLawnCare) November 19, 2019
https://twitter.com/ARHumes/status/1196638801189376001
After the unmitigated debacle that was Jason Witten in the booth last season, you would think ESPN would have learned by now. Alas, it is ESPN, after all.
While ESPN showed this graphic Booger McFarland said “I dont care what the stats say, he’s having a dominant night.”
Uhhhh…. We know, Booger. pic.twitter.com/tNEp2mwkQi
— Brandon Sprague (@BrandonSprague) November 12, 2019
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Eric is a New York City-based writer who still isn’t quite sure how he’s allowed to have this much fun for a living and will tell anyone who listens that Gotham City is canonically in New Jersey. Contact him on Twitter @eric_ital or via email eric@brobible.com