Neymar’s New ‘Step-Dad’ Is A 22-Year-Old TikToking Real Madrid Fan

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Holy shittttt. Now, this is the sort of good news that I’ve — nay, we’ve! — been so desperately needing in life: Neymar’s 52-year-old mother is now dating a 22-year-old TikToking Real Madrid fan who could, potentially, become Neymar’s step-dad. You just absolutely love to see it.

Why does this fill my soul with so much joy, you ask? Because I’m an unabashed monster, that’s why. I’m not even going to pretend I’ve got some sort of semi-defensible reason as to why I enjoy unfortunate circumstances entering Neymar’s life (so long as it doesn’t involve anything serious like his family or his health, of course — what kind of person do you think I am?). I just can’t stand the dude. His arrogance is suffocating and his constantly-diving-style-of-play is a legitimate black mark on the beautiful game. Is he a phenomenal soccer player and athlete? Absolutely. But is he a massive tool? Yes. And that’s what matters round these internet parts.

So, needless to say, when I saw these reports of Neymar’s mother dating someone who is six-years-younger than him AND a Real Madrid fan (Neymar formerly played for Barcelona), I simply couldn’t help but write about it — especially considering his, uh, strange history with his family.

https://twitter.com/SazaFCB/status/1249282118531698689

Not only that, but Neymar’s actual Dad seems to not remotely mind, as he’s been seen commenting kind messages on photos of the couple.

As for the PSG and Brazil star himself, to his credit, he’s been saying all the right things and has been totally supportive of his mother, as he commented on one of her recent Instagrams saying “be happy mom, love you”, which you simply have to respect.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B7E6L0xoya_/?utm_source=ig_embed

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Eric is a New York City-based writer who still isn’t quite sure how he’s allowed to have this much fun for a living and will tell anyone who listens that Gotham City is canonically in New Jersey. Follow him on Twitter @eric_ital for movie and soccer takes or contact him eric@brobible.com