I have 5 simple rules regarding tattoos that I truly believe should be written into the Constitution of the United States:
- Before inking something on your body for eternity, you should be required to get two signatures from a friend and/or guardian. The signature should be written on a piece of paper under seven words: “I think this is a good idea.”
- If you cannot speak the language your tattoo is written in, you may not get it.
- If the last time you went to Church was for your Holy Communion, you may not ink a religious/spiritual tattoo. This includes, but is not limited to, a cross and phrases such as “Only God Can Judge Me.”
- Oh ya, if your team has never won a fucking Super Bowl in franchise history, you absolutely may not get a preseason neck tattoo predicting a Super Bowl victory.
- No neck tattoos. Unless you don’t want a job.
Bruh it’s too early. 💀 pic.twitter.com/yvuYCjT3Ds
— WORLDSTARHIPHOP (@WORLDSTAR) September 13, 2015
Good luck, bro. Your dignity depends on it.
[h/t Next Impulse Sports]