Wayne Gretzky Rookie Card Sold For Almost Half A Frickin’ Million Dollars To Someone Begging To Go Bankrupt

Everybody’s favorite quirky numbers guy, ESPN Senior Writer Darren Rovell, reported that a Wayne Gretzky rookie card sold to an anonymous bidder for a record-setting $465,000.

According to Rovell, that winning bid is more than four times the value of the same card when it sold five years ago for a then record-setting $94,000. The record in question is for a hockey card. How in the holy helmet did that piece of cardboard increase in value by almost five times in five years. Is it tossing a javelin toss trick shot during shootouts? Does it come with a Paulina Gretzky clone?

How are cards still a thing? Granted, I still have a set of NFL cards from 1990 and every time a story like this comes out, I try to sell ’em. But, the going rate is like a smack in the face followed by a kick in the dick. How is Christian Okoye not worth $5?

I could maybe understand the other two notable sales from this same auction. Paying $168k for a game-used Michael Jordan jersey from the 1998 Eastern Conference semifinals? Sure, as long MJ signs it and takes a selfie with me with both our tongues out as Nike makes my own custom Jumpman kicks and Hanes stitches together underwear that masks my farts.

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Shelling out $368,000 for Babe Ruth’s last player contract with the Boston Braves that was worth $75,000? Absolutely, just as long as I can have Babe the Pig wear a Babe Ruth Boston Braves jersey while Babes get Ruthless on each other in a daily home run derby in my backyard, which used to Babe Ruth’s estate.


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