You Can Now Gorge Your Face On Asian And Mexican At The Same Time With The Ramen Burrito

CalTort

California Tortilla, colloquially known as CalTort, is a mid-Atlantic burrito chain with an acceptable imitation of a burrito. It’s pretty good. If you need a burrito, and you are near one, you’ll be like, “Cool, I’ll just go to CalTort.” But if you are near one, and there’s a Chipotle half a block over, you’ll probably be like, “Exercise and worse food? Fuck that.”

So when you are hovering in the firmly better than Qdoba but not quite good as Chipotle range, you need to do something to attract attention.

Hey, how about a crazy gimmick! Crazy gimmicks never backfire! And what’s a hotter gimmick right now than Asian things?

Enter California Tortilla’s ramen burrito. It’s a burrito stuffed with ramen noodles. It’s a… well, that’s really all it is. In their own words:

Rather than rice, the Ramen burrito begins with an authentic Asian noodle base, from there you get your choice of chicken, pork or steak (+.60), scallions, sweet red chili sauce, seasoned corn, fresh avocado, Sriracha pickled onions, cilantro and fresh spinach. Say Sayonara to ordinary!

This is one delicious mashup!

I bet it is, and I assume impartial, third party reviewers will concur. From Brightest Young Things:

tl:dr: burrito not awful but not as good as any other burrito on the menu

A ringing endorsement if I’ve ever heard one. From Washingtonian:

Stuffing a heap of bland, unseasoned “authentic Asian noodle base” into a flour tortilla and calling it a ramen burrito is the opposite, a half-hearted attempt at trendiness. The glutinous cushion doesn’t add any flavor, while the other ingredients—avocado, spinach, corn, cilantro, scallions—are overwhelmed by a heap of potent Sriracha-pickled onions (pack a few mints for after). Should you try it? Only if you need to carb-load while driving.

We all always do. Wait, I mean never. We never need to do that.

Enjoy. It’s only available for a limited time!