Dude Pens Column About How He Won’t Bone Feminists; Internet Notices He May Be The Ugliest MFer Alive

Dave Hon is a man who likes to have sex (probably).

But he ain’t the guy to fuck just anybody.

No, Dave Hon don’t do the dick thing with feminists, and today he took to the internet to announce that stance.

In a piece titled “Why I’ll never date a feminist,” Hon delineates all the reasons confident, assured, great women are off his fuck list forever.

I used to think dating across the political aisle was not only possible, but practical. Hell, if James Carville and Mary Matalin can get along, I can date someone who thinks my genitals automatically give me privileges that they don’t have, right?

Wrong.

People who are more loyal to their gender and not their significant other don’t make good partners. They will always look at you as inherently more fortunate than them. They’ve bought into the “battle of the sexes” mentality and it often pervades their perceptions of romance. Romance turns into a power struggle rather than a partnership.

Really, there’s no reason to roast this uninsightful column that adds nothing to the discussion and will be forgotten by tomorrow, but just look at the dude.

One glance at his picture sent Twitter into a frenzy.

https://twitter.com/morninggloria/status/773974116953194496

https://twitter.com/LorynBrantz/status/773973941450866689

https://twitter.com/Eat_Shop_Travel/status/773941982154649600

https://twitter.com/kashanacauley/status/773974760900456450

https://twitter.com/jessiawesome/status/773979278429913088

As one article commenter put it: “Dude, if anyone is willing to date you, get down on your knees and worship them.”

Seriously, Bro.