Natalie Walker is a 25-year-old actress from New York who, rather than writing lame Yelp reviews like “Salad was bad, waiter was bad and this place literally gave me cancer,” has been writing reviews for every date she’s been on at a given venue. For example, here’s what she had to say about Regal Cinemas Union Square 14:
Regal Cinemas Union Square 14 pic.twitter.com/9bdeQplMje
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 4, 2016
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Although there are only six reviews so far (cut her some slack, she just started), each one manages to not only describe the perfect date from hell but also rate the destination. Would you want to go sit in a theater where you know some kid got a real limp handy for 20+ minutes? I don’t think so. You could be sitting in a puddle of crushed jizz from 2008 and not even know about it!
Cosi on 13th St pic.twitter.com/2Pq6TE56A1
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 4, 2016
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August: Osage County on Broadway pic.twitter.com/3gPKaEZ7aT
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 4, 2016
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AMC Hoffman Center 22 in Alexandria, Virginia pic.twitter.com/h9CUncnoYc
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 5, 2016
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W New York – Times Square pic.twitter.com/GwQm3BWUe5
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 5, 2016
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Studio 54 Theatre – Sunday in the Park with George pic.twitter.com/5B7y7T6hkg
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 5, 2016
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Hamilton the Musical pic.twitter.com/ljUk5ZSK1M
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 6, 2016
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Mt. Vernon Multiplex Cinemas in Alexandria, VA pic.twitter.com/Krbfld5rzt
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 6, 2016
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Teenage angst in a photo booth? Sounds like a theater I’d have to pass on.
Unfortunately, the head honchos over at Yelp had trouble seeing the value Natalie brings to their site, and chose to deactivate her account:
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO pic.twitter.com/YVnmX5x6Eu
— NATALIE WALKER (@nwalks) January 6, 2016
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Not to worry though – Natalie’s been inundated with offers for dates just so she can review them afterwards:
https://www.instagram.com/p/BANUHLurwFl/?taken-by=nwalks
[H/T Metro]