New App Allows You To Retract Those Drunk ‘You Up?’ Texts Before Your Ex-Girlfriend Reads Them

by 2 years ago

drunk text

If you’re like me, you put about as much thought into drunk texts as you do the contents of the ‘Terms and Conditions’ field before clicking ‘Agree.’ I’m probably speaking to the choir here when I say that this technique works as well as a Sony Walkman on a mechanical bull. I avoid looking through my text messages the morning after a night of drinking like I avoid going to the clinic after a questionable hook-up.

But damaged control has finally arrived. A free app called ‘Protect Your Privates’ (available for iOS, but obviously not the Android phone you’re trying to convince yourself is better) contains a message recall feature allowing users to instantly retract messages before they are read. The app also features patent-pending screenshot prevention technology so your ex can’t screenshot your asinine, misspelled text to her group thread.

Check out the video below which details the additional security features. If you need all of this security, you’re probably into some freaky shit and should probably see a medical professional.

Download the app in the app store or visit the website. Or you could stop being a drunk fucking sketchball. One of the three.


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