The 40 Phrases That Define Your Freshman Year Of College

Freshman year is here. Congratulations! You’ve survived the oh-so-stereotypical high school life and moved onto bigger things. Freshman year, when done right, will easily be the best year of your life. So why not see what’s going to run through your mind? Or, if you’ve finally entered the real world like a lot of people and completely regret getting your degree in 4 years instead of 10, take a trip down that drunken memory lane that was your college experience.

1. “Yeah, you know. High school was just so lame that I had to go out of state.”

2. “Yeah, the guy over at -INSERT RANDOM GREEK HOUSE- says there is a strict policy against hazing here.”

3. “Dude I cant even tell you what I went through last night. But it was fucking hell.”

4. “I probably could’ve gotten a bid from any house.”

5. “Dude! We set up a beer pong table in my dorm room last night! Such a dope night!”

6. “I’ve never trolled in beer pong.”

7. “…I mean everyone is bound to have a bad game.”

8. “WTF! The internet is so slow I cant even Skype my girlfriend.”

9. “What we have is just so special. Everyone says we aren’t going to work out. But they really just don’t know us.”

10. “No worries, I was a tank in high school.”

11. “Dude I’ve never been that drunk.”

12. “I can’t even get drunk off beer anymore.”

13. “Bro, only reason I puked last night was because my stomach…was just so full from the beer.”

14. “My mom is actually pretty chill with me drinking now.”

15. “DUDE! WHAT THE FUCK! I told you my mom was visiting why was there an empty fifth on the counter?”

16. “You can get puke out of sheets right?”

17. “Yeah my friend who has this one friend that’s friends with this other kid actually drank with insert star college athlete in high school.”

18. “Hashtag YOLO.”

19. “Honestly, the sickest thing about college is the fact no one gives any fucks.”

20. “Dude– I swear she just doesn’t look good in pictures.”

21. “Honestly, I just had the worst luck with girls in high school. I’m shocked I’m still a virgin.”

22. “How awesome is casual sex. Am I right?!”

23. “My high school friends are actually awesome.”

24. “I don’t know what I’m going to do this summer. All my high school friends ended up being geeds.”

25. “No really, I am going to do the suggested readings this term.”

26. “You think it’s a good idea to start my essay now?”

27. “No way will I use Adderall to study.”

28. “Dude is Adderall like the HGH for college students?”

29. “I honestly can’t go through the dining halls anymore without seeing someone I’ve hooked up with.”

30. “I don’t get why freshman get such a bad rep.”

31. “NO! You don’t understand my professor said we must have the textbook or we’ll fail.”

32. “Dude my hall actually has a pretty chill RA.”

33. “(*Knock on dorm room door*) FUCK!”

34. “Man I was so jacked before freshman year.”

35. “The ‘freshman 15’ is not going to happen to me. I take care of myself.”

36. “Did you hear you can get quesaritos with our dorm points?!

37. “…Wait. What do you mean there’s no more chaser?”

38. “Dude, I don’t remember the last Thursday I was sober.”

39. “I think I might be an alcoholic now.”

40. “I am never drinking again. Period.”

It’s time to go utter some typical freshman nonsense…and have the best year of your life while doing it. Go slay’em, tiger.

[Image via Shutterstock]