Allow This LSU Student To Show You How To Never Apply For A Job, Even At BroBible
We love it when our readers e-mail us here at BroBible. As a group, nothing brings a bigger smile to our collective faces. Usually it’s people of questionable IQ hawking and hustling their revolutionary new apps or shitty music videos or terribly unfunny YouTube attempts at sketch comedy or lame Kickstarter projects for something no one needs, like shot glasses for laundry detergent. They almost always start with “I’m a huge BroBible fan!” as if that’s fellatio for our egos or something. Like, we’re not idiots — we know you’re pitching 500 other blogs with the exact same crap.
Here’s an example of the always entertaining BroBible inbox over the last 24-hours:
Crowdfunding is the new panhandling. I’ve never given less of a fuck about something.
Boulder is kinda dope.
Psstt…. We don’t have a Book Review section. We’ve never had a “book review section.” Do you think this is the New York Times or some shit?
You get the point.
Last night, however, we received what might be the world’s worst pitch ever. Amazingly, it’s for a job writing at BroBible, where — believe it or not, we have *SOME* standards when it comes to employment (like willingness to chug Papa John’s garlic sauce).
It’s from a student at LSU. It’s a pretty good case study on how to not get a job anywhere, even for Internet sites that blog about the nastiest fast food shit anyone has ever seen.
Have fun with your continued pursuit of gainful employment with that pitch strategy.