Burning Man 2017 Is Underway, So Here Are The 10 Photos From The Hippy Festival That Sum It Up Perfectly

by 2 years ago

Full disclosure: my knowledge of Burning Man is limited. My naive assessment of the event is that it’s Halloween for rich homeless people. Like they could afford a home, but they choose to sleep in a hammock behind a pilates studio and eat acorns but drink $12 acai berry smoothies. I also believe that it is the only event in the world that attracts both the ugliest people in the world and the hottest. The only place where you can find Emily Ratajkowski mingling with my middle school music teacher with a braided rat tail and gingivitis. Also, it’s the best place in the world to see a grown man’s penis. Actually most of the penises are swallowed up by three decades of abandoned pubic hair. Again, I have zero first-hand accounts from Burning Man, this is just how I fantasize it being. I fantasize about pubic hair afros on strange men. This is a conversation I need to have privately with myself.

In any event, 70,000 people have descended upon the Black Rock Desert 120 miles north of Reno, Nevada for the nine-day festival that is Burning Man. We are currently on day 3 and I’ve taken the liberty of compiling 10 photos that I reinforce my views of the festival. Enjoy.

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