No Calories. No artificial sweeteners. No sodium. There is no number other than 0 on the cans’ Nutritional Facts box. It’s a goddamn mystery why La Croix flavored sparkling water is so damn satisfying. I’m drinking the lime flavored one as I type this and it’s like a Sprite for grownups who can’t drink soda anymore due to a nonfunctional metabolism and a growing risk of Type II Diabetes.
People’s obsession with the sparkling water and its 20 flavors is indicative in the numbers, too. La Croix is on pace for a record-setting year, announcing earnings of $0.52 per share for the third quarter of fiscal year 2017 (an increase of 117% over the same period last year), Business Insider reports.
I know I can’t be the only one whose wondered how La Croix is so flavorful when it has literally zero of the bad shit. On some of the cans, you’ll notice it says “naturally essences,” which sounds like weightless marketing jargon. But, as The Wall Street Journal uncovered, ‘natural essence’ is actually a real ingredient.
“Essence is actually a clear, concentrated natural chemical that’s been used for decades in products as varied as gravy, ice pops, coffee, shampoo and even insecticide, according to industry executives and scientists,” the Journalreported.
Essence is created by heating items such as fruit and vegetable skins, rinds, and remnants at high temperatures, producing vapors, claims Business Insider. These vapors are condensed and then sold by the barrel.
This tweet is starting to make more and more sense…
Person who loves LaCroix: *Eating a scented candle* this is also good
— Abam (@AdamBroud) August 27, 2017
[h/t Business Insider]