- The elephant was voted most likely to win a fight
- An unarmed human wins out only 17% of the time against these animals
- More weird news here
A new poll asking Americans which animals they think they could beat in a fight resulted in some hilarious responses and reactions.
The poll, conducted online by YouGov.com, pitted 34 different animals (counting humans) against one another to determine which animal people think would be the most difficult to beat in a fight.
We showed people seven random pairings of animals from the list and asked them which of the two they thought would win in a fight. Animals are ranked by their “win percentage”, that is, how often Americans thought that animal would win in a head-to-head matchup when it was one of the two animals shown.
The end result is that humans think the elephant and the rhinoceros would be the toughest animals in the kingdom to beat in a fight, regardless of which other animal was their opponent, with a win percentage of 74%.
Coming in third is the grizzly bear, just a hair behind, at 73%, followed by the tiger at 70%, the hippopotamus at 69%, and the lion at 68%.
Crocodiles, alligators, gorillas and polar bears round out the top 10.
The survey you never knew you wanted: which animal would win in a fight?— YouGov America (@YouGovAmerica) May 13, 2021
🐘 74% win rate
🦢 14%https://t.co/lFhqKpyCpK pic.twitter.com/VLq3mTGIex
However, when humans were pitted one-on-one against the animals we didn’t fare nearly as well.
When asked which of the animals humans think they could beat in a fight if unarmed, the only animals we solidly think we can take are the rat (72%), house cat (69%), and a goose (61%).
That’s it. Out of the 33 animal opponents, those are the only three we believed we can beat in a fight over 50% of the time.
Amazingly, there are some humans out there that think they are tougher than the rest of us as a very surprising 6% think they could beat a girzzly bear in a fight, while 8% think they could take down a lion, a gorilla, or a elephant.
What animals do Americans think they could beat in a fight? It doesn't look good for the human race...— YouGov America (@YouGovAmerica) May 14, 2021
🐀 72% could beat in a fight
🐕 (medium) 49%
🐕 (large) 23%
🐻 6%https://t.co/lFhqKpyCpK pic.twitter.com/ahmR95ADSg
And the answers really weren’t that different based on sex. Women were just as likely to have these visions of fighting grandeur.
After *THAT* Serena Williams poll, we thought we might see men overclaiming on their ability to beat up certain animals, but when it comes to the scariest (🐻🦁🦍🐘🐊) male and female responses are about the samehttps://t.co/lFhqKpyCpK pic.twitter.com/JgUZKj5YOK— YouGov America (@YouGovAmerica) May 14, 2021
Reactions to the results of the poll were, of course, classic.
America seriously underestimating that goose... pic.twitter.com/OMGudBe5vm— Kelly K-9 (@Kelly_K_9) May 14, 2021
I don’t know what’s worse, the 8% that think they have any chance against a lion, elephant or gorilla or the 31% afraid of a fight with a house cat.— Bret Brillante (@BretBrillante) May 14, 2021
The level of delusion in this country is incredible. 23% of Americans can't get off the couch without using their hands. No way they're washing a large dog in a fight.— Troy Flint (@tboneflint) May 14, 2021
I feel like this 30% who is confident in their ability to defeat an eagle is mistaken. This eagle is going to hurt you before you catch its ass. They go for the eyes.— Gnario Galaxy (@valor_club) May 14, 2021
I would fight every one of these animals. I would beat the top two. If the cat wasn't really mad.— Ian Fortey Is Writing About a Necromancer (@IanFortey) May 14, 2021
People who think they could beat a monkey have never seen a monkey bite a man's face off.