Do you need an excuse to get out of yet another soul-crushing video conference call? There’s an app for that. The Zoom Escaper app enables you to make a clean getaway from your work video calls by fabricating technical glitches or unwanted sounds such as construction noise.
Zoom Escaper is a free “tool to help you escape Zoom meetings and other video conferencing scenarios. It allows you to self-sabotage your audio stream, making your presence unbearable to others.”
There are sound effects to make others on your Zoom call believe that you are having technical difficulties, including a bad connection, echo, feedback noise, and choppiness. There are also sound effects of unwanted noises such as construction sounds, dogs barking, babies crying (probably don’t use this if you don’t have a baby), wind interference (probably don’t use this one if you’re in the middle of your climate-controlled office), a man weeping (you’ll likely already be crying if you’ve been on a work call over 15 minutes), and urination. Not sure how someone pissing in the background is going to get you out of a call, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
The tutorial shows you how to get Zoom Escaper up and running. You will need to download VB-Audio, a free audio software that allows users to create a digital audio input. You’ll also need to change a few settings on Zoom. Change your mic input to “VB-Cable,” set “suppress background noise” to low, and turn off high-fidelity music mode, echo cancellation, and stereo audio.
Zoom Escaper was created by artist and programmer Sam Lavigne, who also developed Zoom Deleter, a program that “continually checks for the presence of Zoom on your computer, and if found, immediately deletes it.”
Now, if only there was an app that prevents your annoying bootlicking coworker from asking unnecessary questions at the end of the Zoom call that adds 20 more minutes of nonsense.