Britney Spears Is So Hot In Her New Music Video That I May Have Permanent Retinal Damage Due To Repeat Viewings

Britney Britney Britney. You’ll be hearing from my insurance soon because you’re so hot in the video that my retinas have been scorched from staring directly into the white hot heat of your hotness. It’s no secret that pretty much our entire staff is First Team All American for being fans of Britney Spears, but how about those hotties she’s hanging with? I’d watch those ladies sit around and eat brunch on a neverending loop if it meant being able to stare at them more. Honestly, it twists my mind like a fucking slinky that Britney is a mother of two. She’s the kind of hot I wouldn’t even want to sleep with because I’d just disappoint her and get laughed at. But, at the same time, I’d willingly get laughed at if it meant popping some cum oysters in the same bedroom that Britney is in.