LOVE IS DEAD: Avril Lavigne And Chad Kroeger Are Getting Divorced And Chad’s Coming To Bang Your Girlfriend


First, rumors circulate that Tom Brady and Gisele may be splitting after six years of marriage and now THIS? How much love can possibly die in one day?

I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again, celebrities should never get married.

Neither should Avril and Chad.

Avril took to Instagram to publicly announce her separation with Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger and it’s TRULY heartbreaking.

No, no, Avril. You’re wrong. I know it’s ‘Complicated’ and I’m not trying to tell you how to live your lives, but humanity needs you two to stick together.  You were made for each other. You were the beacon of hope for all of us loners meandering through life trying desperately to find love. You’re both Canadian.

And we simply cannot bare a new onslaught of Nickelback and Avril Lavigne break up music.





P.S. I have a feeling this divorce is going to a legal cluster fuck. Who’s going to take possession of the nickel? Is Avril going to keep it, or will she give the Nickel Back? Remains to be seen.

P.P.S. Chad’s coming to fuck your girl.

[h/t Complex]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.