Chris Pratt Sends Nick Offerman Pics Of His Impressive Dumps But A New Toilet Is Ruining Their Friendship

by 4 years ago

Chris Pratt, Nick Offerman, and Adam Scott (not the golfer) all became close friends on the set of NBC’s Parks & Recreation. For years they would bond over their magnificent poops, the dumps that would make Randy Marsh proud (craps measuring 7 Courics and above on the European Fecal Standards and Measurements scale).

When one of the dudes dropped a magnificent crap they’d text it to the rest of the crew with some sort of ‘check this shit out!’ message, and this went on for years. But based on Chris Pratt‘s story above it sounds like this Chris Pratt-Nick Offerman-Adam Scott friendship has become strained and it’s all due to Pratt’s new Japanese Toto Toilet which sucks up the shit before he’s ever had a chance to document it for his bros.

It’s sad that these actors have all gone on to become so famous they no longer have time to send each other pictures of their shits. Chris Pratt is officially on the upper echelon of Hollywood’s ‘A List’, having starred in some of the biggest blockbuster films of the past few years. Nick Offerman is a household name, and his identity will forever be synonymous with his Parks & Recreation character Ron Swanson.

For a fleeting moment I found it reassuring that these bros could become the most famous men in the world and still take pleasure in sophomoric activities like texting pictures of impressive dumps, but then my hope was squashed upon finding out Chris Pratt’s Hollywood wealth has gotten in the way. His fancy toilet is ruining friendships. And I hope he’s smart enough to make a switch before it’s too late, before the friendships can’t be salvaged.

Cass Anderson is Managing Editor of BroBible. He graduated from Florida State University, has been to more Phish concerts than he’d like to admit, and primarily specializes in Outdoors and Gear-related content.

TAGSchris prattConanConan O'BrienNick Offermanpoop stuff