Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more.
Strap in. It could get bumpy. These are the most entertaining celebrity tweets this week.
Any celeb looking for a charity, UN says 1 billion ppl still practice"open defecation", mostly in India/Africa, but also Ted Nugent concerts
— Bill Maher (@billmaher) December 8, 2014
This is true.
what lady doesn't want to live with her man's mom?
— Adam Carolla (@adamcarolla) December 8, 2014
Ladies?
6:30 am and already hit the gym!! GOOD MORNING!!!! Have an amazing Monday… They don't have to suck. 💗
— Demi Lovato (@ddlovato) December 8, 2014
Shut up. Yes they do.
Nope… nada, zero desire to get out of bed this morning #moodymonday
— leann rimes cibrian (@leannrimes) December 8, 2014
See?
https://twitter.com/taylorswift13/status/541977994370502656
You know, I just heard Tay was hooking up with…
Judging by the title of his show and what actually happened, the guy from 'Eaten Alive' must be fucking awful in bed.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) December 8, 2014
Hmmm…
https://twitter.com/jasoncollins98/status/542058180381917184
So wrong.
https://twitter.com/wilw/status/542069750780526593
The symmetry is striking.
https://twitter.com/ChrisWarcraft/status/542224484724252672
It’s a “special” bow.
https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/542286864095666176
That’s their hook.
There's the United States, then there's Texas.
— Bree Olson (@BreeOlson) December 9, 2014
And that’s just the way they like it.
Never forget, the mall Santa has a human dick.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) December 9, 2014
#NEVERFORGET.
@JennyJohnsonHi5 let the kids have their dreams
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) December 9, 2014
I don’t even know what that means.
I lift my hands in total adoration to You! Jesus is so good!
— Russell Wilson (@DangeRussWilson) December 9, 2014
I hear he he’s a good wingman.
The Cleveland Browns have paid Johnny Manziel a total of $4,664,862 so far, including his signing bonus.
— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) December 9, 2014
Worth every penny.
Whoever just farted on my flight is a FUCKING COWARD!!!!!
— Nick Swardson (@NickSwardson) December 9, 2014
You know it was him, right?
Airport bars are amazing. Everyone is getting smashed trying to ignore the fact that a metal tube is carrying us all in the air. #logan
— Nick Swardson (@NickSwardson) December 9, 2014
That why we have them.
https://twitter.com/oliviamunn/status/542556960068231168
Please say it ain’t so.
https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen/status/542569764326211585
Good information to know.
https://twitter.com/JohnStamos/status/542688626891431936
Go fuck yourself, Stamos.
https://twitter.com/therealroseanne/status/542720101720797184
I don’t think anyone should get married.
Brady hasn't seen "sexy" Gronk pictures in ESPN mag but said it sounded about right: "perfect Gronk"
— Michele Steele (@MicheleSteele) December 10, 2014
Ah, my last Tweet. Cathartic, with a bonus: it flushed out the sadist ghouls among my followers. Here we go, 'BLOCK' button!
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 10, 2014
You do have to flush those people out every now and then.
https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/542797373349834752
That’s the spirit.
Next season on American Horror Story every recurring character will die in every scene
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) December 11, 2014
Seems about right.
1. Put a Santa hat on the corner of your TV.*
2. Every time someone on TV "wears" the hat take a drink!
(*Kill self before this step)— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 11, 2014
Happy holidays?
Remember a few years ago when the way to tell if a girl was cool was to see if she had the Kim Possible text tone
— Dove Cameron (@DoveCameron) December 11, 2014
Wait, is that not still cool?
I'm just glad it's illegal to eat healthy during the month of December. #rerun
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) December 11, 2014
You and me both, brother.
I've spent the better half of the day consoling #ScrawnyArms over his #GoldenGlobe snub. I told him "Showbiz is a tough racket."
— Rob Lowe (@RobLowe) December 11, 2014
“Scrawny Arms” Rob Lowe is my favorite Rob Lowe.
Tired of the weird looks I get whenever I pronounce the “t” in Christmas.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) December 12, 2014
I am going to start doing that now.
Remember when u could call someone on the phone without having to text them first for permission ?
— Judah Friedlander (@JudahWorldChamp) December 12, 2014
Oh yeah!
hello @lorde are you a fucking jabroni?
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) December 10, 2014
Have a great weekend, everybody!