The 31 Most Entertaining Celebrity Tweets This Week

Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more.

Strap in. It could get bumpy. These are the most entertaining celebrity tweets this week.

I may have lost Miss Universe again but it was such an honor to compete w/ all those classy ladies from all those weird foreign countries.

— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) January 26, 2015

You gave it a good shot, Jim.

https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/559571534935638016

The more you know.

Don't worry people. I'm already testing the PSI of Team Irvin's footballs.

— Rich Eisen (@richeisen) January 26, 2015

Thank God he said “footballs.”

How kids feel about snow days is the exact opposite of how parents feel about snow days.

— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) January 26, 2015

TRUTH.

Word is that Jeb Bush is working on a 2016 campaign slogan. So far the frontrunner is: “Vote Bush – Because it’s Been the Required 8 Years.”

— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) January 26, 2015

Also accurate.

https://twitter.com/amyschumer/status/559670749968224257

She has a point.

I remember many occasions when the snow was drifted above our Kansas windows..back when snow symbolized sledding, not the apocalypse

— Kirstie Alley (@kirstiealley) January 26, 2015

See Jim Gaffigan’s earlier tweet.

https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen/status/559727781492191232

Chrissy is always the voice of reason.

BREAKING NEWS: Greatest blizzard of snow tweets/photos in New York history.

— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) January 26, 2015

No shit, Piers.

How do you tell a Snow Man from a Snow Woman? Snow Balls. I apologize to all Snow People. RT Immediately! #blizzardof2015

— Gilbert Gottfried (@RealGilbert) January 26, 2015

Stop shaking your head.

Been hearing that groceries running out of food because of advance storm shopping. Wonder if drug stores running out of condoms?

— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) January 26, 2015

Leave it to Dr. Ruth to take it there.

https://twitter.com/JohnStamos/status/559762186101223425

You didn’t follow your own advice, John.

Life's like a fine wine. I sniff it. I swirl it. I take a small sip and then drink deeply, pretending 2 enjoy it because people are looking.

— (((Jew))) (@JoshMalina) January 26, 2015

That’s pretty deep.

https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/559774181785894912

Seriously, when are we going to catch a break?

Did someone finally kill Facebook?

— marc maron (@marcmaron) January 27, 2015

Just a self-inflicted flesh wound.

https://twitter.com/zachbraff/status/559982766847037440

I always wonder that.

I dont care if we didnt get much snow. today im going to drink the 10 gallons of water & eat the 20 cans of baked beans I bought yesterday

— Judah Friedlander (@JudahWorldChamp) January 27, 2015

As one should.

Media day: the result of daddies not hugging their babies.

— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) January 27, 2015

Wonder if she has anyone particular in mind?

I respond to text messages in my head. Sometimes weeks go by before I realize I didn't respond in real life. I'm working on that.

— Nicki Minaj (@NICKIMINAJ) January 27, 2015

I know people like her.

Sports Illustrated laid off all its photographers. Good luck finding someone willing to take pictures of hot swimsuits models for free.

— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) January 28, 2015

Yeah, they’re so screwed.

https://twitter.com/OfficialKat/status/560350363627585536

Seems like a pretty harsh stance, but okay.

Okay… So is "50 Shades of Gray" a horror movie?

— Heidi Montag (@heidimontag) January 28, 2015

For men who have to go see it? Yes.

https://twitter.com/JamesDeen/status/560492971330895872

Solid advice.

Just found out that Chinese Fire Drills didn’t actually originate in the People’s Republic of China. Has EVERYTHING BEEN A LIE??

— Al Yankovic (@alyankovic) January 28, 2015

Yes.

I wouldn't say this Arizona Super Bowl is spread out, but I think I just saw Heisenberg.

— Rich Eisen (@richeisen) January 29, 2015

There it is, finally a Super Bowl in the Southwest Heisenberg joke.

I think sitting on an airplane is the most exhausting type of sitting.

— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) January 29, 2015

He ain’t lying.

https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/560827785753952257

Sounds like a plan.

Steelers fans use more profane language on social media than fans of any other NFL team, according to data analyzed by Proofpoint Nexgate

— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) January 29, 2015

I am so disappointed in you, Oakland.