Alabama fans are not gonna like this one. Saturday Night Live lampooned colleges that help dumb football players pass their classes so that they can still play in the big game and bring oodles of money to the university from all the revenue streams derived from athletics.
The great John Cena plays Ray, a Crimson Tide football player who is giving his final science presentation at the University of Alabama. Dressed in his #23 Bama football jersey he presents his science project with two other students. Now Ray takes his academics “incredibly seriously” and proclaims that he will not play in the big bowl game unless he gets an A+ on his science project that details many unknown facts about bananas.
However, Cena faces some stern and rigid professors that pledge to be critical.
“Don’t you expect any favors from us,” a professor (Kenan Thompson) covered in Alabama facepaint declares.
Another professor (Beck Bennett) thanks Ray for signing his Alabama hat.
During Ray’s extensive research on Musa acuminata Colla and Musa balbisiana he discovered these amazing facts:
- Bananas are a yellow snack that monkeys eat
- There are five types of bananas including yellow, brown spotty, very brown, green, and round
- They look like weiners
- They’re yummy
- The outside of a banana is called the “crust”
They do look like weiners.
Ray then prepared to get an A+ on his English lit final by studying “The Very Hungry Caterpillar.”
John Cena, it would be best that you steer clear of Alabama for the foreseeable future.