Alison Brie attracts foot fetish freak at grocery store

CBS

We learned some valuable information last night about Alison Brie, star of Community and love of my life. In an interview on the Late Show, Brie sheepishly informed viewers of her last name, Schermerhorn. Most Brie fans already knew this but it’s rarely spoken aloud in public.

The second nugget of information was about her feet. Now, as a lover of all things Brie, I’ll be honest in saying that’s far from my favorite thing about her. I appreciate Brie’s laugh, Brie’s rapping, the way she handles a pottery wheel and her bounciness, among other things. But her feet? Nah. Never really noticed. One man however did notice and he creepily stalked Brie in a grocery store because of it.

“I’m at the market and a guy comes up to me and he stops me, ‘Oh my god oh my god I am so sorry I just had to stop you.’ And I’m like what show is he gonna be a fan of…’I had to stop you because your feet, your feet are gorgeous.’ And he goes on ‘My ex-girlfriend had incredible feet and yours are even better.’ I was glad that he qualified it with the ex-girlfriend because I knew he was single and I knew he was into feet…and he says, ‘Would you mind if we exchanged numbers for any time you want just a totally platonic foot massage…so I do what any girl does when met with an unwanted suitor, we drop the boyfriend card, ‘That sounds wonderful but I think that my boyfriend might be a little weirded out by this’ and he says ‘Well a little weirded out is not a lot.’”

I don’t know, these look like run-of-the-mill feet. Certainly not worthy of a grocery store stalking. I feel like I need another opinion on this—your thoughts Rex Ryan?

CBS