Listen, things just got SUPER SERIOUS in the Donald Sterling fiasco. Dennis Hof, owner and operator of Nevada’s Bunny Ranch, has banned Sterling from his establishments–all six of them. This is a friendly reminder that being a racist affects all things in life, including your ability to get nailed by prostitutes.
“A lot of NBA players come here to party,” Hof told The Huffington Post. “Out of respect to them, we have banned Sterling from coming here.”
Hof says his sense of confidentiality prohibits him from confirming or denying if Sterling has ever visited his brothels.
“I can tell you this: Johnny Buss, one of the owners of the Los Angeles Lakers, and I have had a dual birthday party at the Bunny Ranch for the last 18 years, so a lot of NBA people have been here,” he said.
I realize Hof’s threats are kind of empty, especially since Sterling basically employs mistresses as prostitutes. But he makes a solid point here.
“At any given time, 20 to 23 percent of the prostitutes here are African-American,” Hof said. “And they’re smoking hot. Some of them were crying this morning so we’re doing this for them as well. We don’t need racists or bigots at the Bunny Ranch.”
Um, so yeah, call me sappy or whatever but that hit me right in the feels. I want to go to the Bunny Ranch and hug those poor girls, I want to comfort them, I want to take their pain away, I want to touch their boobies and yeah, I crossed the line didn’t I?