The South American Goliath birdeater spider is the largest known species of spider in the world, and entomologist Piotr Naskrecki just happened upon one during a night walk that was the size of a goddamn puppy.
Stop for a second and think about this: a spider that is the size of a puppy, and that’s most likely to come out at night when you’re least likely to be able to see it.
The South American Goliath birdeater spider can have legs spanning nearly 30cm (about 1 foot), and can weigh over 170g (6.0oz), the size of a fucking puppy but with pincers and eight legs and a menacing look about them.
Recently a photographer/entomologis by the name of Piotr Naskrecki came face-to-face with one in the jungles of Guyana.
Piotr Naskrecki was taking a nighttime walk in a rainforest in Guyana, when he heard rustling as if something were creeping underfoot. When he turned on his flashlight, he expected to see a small mammal, such as a possum or a rat.
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“When I turned on the light, I couldn’t quite understand what I was seeing,” said Naskrecki, an entomologist and photographer at Harvard University’s Museum of Comparative Zoology.
A moment later, he realized he was looking not at a brown, furry mammal, but an enormous, puppy-size spider.
Naskrecki catalogued the entire encounter HERE on his blog, and it’s all rather fascinating, assuming you have some sort of predilection for eight-legged creatures who go bump in the night.
A few years ago I was deep in the rainforest of Guyana doing just that – listening to the sounds of the night in a complete darkness – when I heard the rustle of an animal running. I could clearly hear its hard feet hitting the ground and dry leaves crumbling under its weight. I pressed the switch and pointed the light at the source of the sound, expecting to see a small mammal, a possum, a rat maybe. And at first this is what I thought I saw – a big, hairy animal, the size of a rodent. But something wasn’t right, and for a split second the atavistic part of my brain sent a ping of regret that I didn’t bring any companion with me on this particular night walk. But before that second was over I was lunging at the animal, ecstatic about finally seeing one of these wonderful, almost mythical creatures in person.
The answer is yes, yes it is okay to shit your pants in that situation. When you’re in the pitch black rainforest armed with only a flashlight and you’re face-to-face with a spider the size of a puppy. That’s when it is okay to poop your pants. I won’t judge you, and if anyone else judges you then you come back here and tell me and I’ll find them and leave mean comments on their Facebook page, because you have my permission to shit yourself, and I don’t give that permission out lightly.
For more on the spider check out Piotr Naskrecki’s BLOG HERE.
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