Germany’s World Cup hero, Mario Gotze, has a boner issue

Today, somebody sent me a link that said “the two biggest moments in Gotze’s life.” I clicked thinking it was a meme about Germany’s World Cup hero Mario Gotze and his supermodel girlfriend, Ann-Kathrin Brommel. I was right, sort of.

On Saturday, I took a long walk along the Delaware River, pondered my career path, thought about where I was headed in life. I said, “Isaac, you have a lot of good things going for you but you need to stop posting about the male erection.” Turns out, I rarely listen to myself.

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