Move over Chipotle secret menu, the queserito is about to be front and center. I went to taste test the Taco Bell Queserito and found a new secret menu item in the process.
There’s something amiss in the world when my door guy asks me if I’ve had the new Taco Bell Queserito, and I reply no. As Jermaine Dupri once said, “Ya slackin on your pimpin, turn it up.” And that’s exactly what I did. I hopped on a bus, because money is a thang, and headed to Taco Bell.
For those new to the internet, a queserito is a burrito that uses a quesadilla in place of the boring single tortilla. Picture a “Mexican” version of the KFC Double Down. It’s like an edible Diego Rivera mural… brilliant.
The Taco Bell Queserito is holy mixture of beef/steak/shredded chicken, premium Latin rice, Chipotle sauce, reduced-fat sour cream, wrapped up in a grilled quesadilla loaded with nacho cheese.
I’m normally not big on Taco Bell’s quesadilla or grilled burritos because if I wanted my soft shell to be hard, I would have ordered a Doritos Locos Taco (which I did anyway). Being packed with nacho cheese made everything right in the world though, and it was probably the best part of the food log. Everything at Taco Bell should be smothered in nacho cheese, even the Mountain Dew Baja Blast.
Aside: I really miss back when the Nacho Cheese Double Decker.
If the cheese was the best part of the Taco Bell Queserito, the rice was the worst. I’m not a Latin rice aficionado, but I don’t imagine it’s supposed to be the consistency of instant grits. We all learned from My Cousin Vinnie that “no self-respecting southerner uses instant grits,” and this is probably why. Luckily I assume the innards of all Taco Bell burritos are going to be a steaming pile of slop, so it didn’t really bother me. It all comes together in a beautiful way, and that’s what’s important. Plus it has chipotle sauce, and it’s no secret that I’m a sucker for anything spicy.
I tried the steak and shredded chicken versions, and unlike when I reviewed the Taco Bell Smothered Burrito, the shredded chicken did nothing for me. I blame the rice. Chunks of steak, on the other hand, we’re perfect. At 650 calories and 34 grams of fat a piece, my body is definitely unhappy that I tried both. It could also be the newly discovered Taco Bell secret menu item that put me over the edge.
Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes are still on the website, but they’ve disappeared from many of the menus. Fortunately they still have all the ingredients lying around thanks to the Cheesy Potato Burrito, so don’t let them tell you they can’t make them.
The big discovery last night was that you can add things to your little happiness bowl. The cashier of the year informed me, as if he was confessing his sins, that you can put anything you want on top of the potatoes. The rest, as they say, is gastric history.
“We may not be Burger King, but you can still have it your way” – Heroic Taco Bell cashier