Many bros have perished with the ‘Mile High Club’ the only box unchecked on their bucket list. I’ve been of the belief that boning on an airplane is nothing more than, quite literally, a pipe dream. A bro fantasy. The Mile High Club is a lot like the show The Big Bang Theory in that its extremely popular but I legitimately don’t know one person who can tell me first-hand its worth my 22 minutes. Ok, six minutes….Ok ok, six pumps.
Welp, thanks to the website Jetsetter, we know have the hard numbers on the percentage of travelers who have slapped skins in a 2×2 foot, shit-smelling box.
In a new poll of 1,600 travelers, the website Jetsetter found that 15 percent of respondents said they have had sex on a plane. Another recent study by the British airfare search engine Jetcost surveyed over 700 British flight attendants and found that 21 percent of them had participated in sexual relations with a colleague, while 14 percent had done so with passengers. It appears that flying the friendly skies is getting friendlier all the time. [via Travel and Leisure]
Travel and Leisure also surveyed an anonymous airline crew on how best to have an orgasm at 35,000 feet without getting tagged as a sex offender.
“Long-haul flights, and relatively empty ones are best, ” says one flight attendant with a major legacy carrier. “A lot of them are overnight, so people have some time to drink, the cabin gets dark, and off you go.” Our flight attendants also clock the most copulation on flights to popular party destinations like Vegas or the Maldives.
“Use the handicapped lav because it’s larger and there’s more space to maneuver. Plus they have handicap rails so you have something to grip.” Just remember, says another, “We can get into the bathroom at any point,” so don’t think that lock will keep you safe.
Semi-related sidenote: If you use any handicap restroom to take a shit or have sex, you can’t bitch at me when I park in the handicap spot to run into the liquor store. The selective outrage for the handicapped is nauseating. Shitting in a handicapped bathroom is worse than parking in a spot for 4 minutes because not all handicapped people can drive, but all of them need to shit.
Anyhoo, I hope this data and these tips help you work up the courage to earn your Mile High wings. As for me, I’ve already conceded to never boning on an airplane. A little turbulence has me using the plane WiFi to tell my mom I love her. And the two bars of Xanax I eat before takeoff probably isn’t conducive to an erection.