A Bald Eagle Named Uncle Sam Attacked Donald Trump, Proving He Is Not The Man For The White House
In James Cameron’s 2009 blockbuster film Avatar, the warriors of the Na’vi had to mount and braid meld with a Mountain Banshee before being considered true members of the tribe.
Many people don’t know this, but a similar practice has been part of American elections for as long as we’ve been a nation. In 1788, George Washington rode a bald eagle from Philadelphia to New York, setting the precedent that all American leaders must be able to tame the beast.
John Jay couldn’t. Fuck John Jay.
Every president since has successfully handled the bald eagle. Millard Fillmore, whilst a terrible leader, damn near became the eagle when he rode it, so at one with the bird he was.
Meanwhile, poor Adlai Stevenson? Every time he tried, the eagle shut him down.
The media typically does not report on these sessions, out of respect for the candidates and the eagles and the process. That’s why you’ve never heard of them. But they do exist.
And today, Time Magazine lifted the veil on Donald Trump’s meeting with the eagle.
It’s a big, risky move by the publisher, but it’s believed with all the negative statements Donald Trump has made in recent weeks, Time deemed it okay to violate the ethics of the industry and let the public know Trump is not the one true eagle tamer of 2016.
You can watch more of the eagle attacking Trump here.
[Via BroBible Editor Emeritus Kyle Koster]