Canadian Mounties Find Naked Man At Gas Station Covered In Milk After Bear Spray Fiasco
Cops were called to a gas station in Edmonton to … I don’t know, “contain”?… a situation in which a man had accidentally sprayed himself with Bear Spray, stripped naked, then rubbed his genitals with his shirt that was soaked in homogenized milk. Why the writer of this article felt the need to specify the type of milk is beyond my pay scale.
According to reports, the man initially claimed he was attacked by someone wielding the bear spray, but upon further review, the forensics and analytics teams (seriously?) concluded it was self-inflicted.
A) Bear spray exists. I had no clue. B) Bear spray is like pepper spray on steroids. C) FIVE other people were found doing the same exact thing as this dude on the front lawn of a home. D) Canadian teens use bear spray as a weapon.