Watch 74-Year-Old Presidential Candidate Bernie Sanders #FeelTheBern Of Running Late For A Train

What is Bernie Sanders doing here? He’s #feelingthebern of being late for his train, something that many of us in the Northeast Corridor can commiserate with. Run, Bernie, run! Don’t let anyone tell you you’re not in shape to be President.

Many of Bernie’s supporters probably find it endearing to see their beloved Presidential pick taking a train. For a lot of America, however, it’s a sign that he’s a lizard communist who wants to steal from the rich and re-invest it in archaic methods of transportation, like trains. Who even uses those? Trains are easily most socialist method of public transportation — there’s not really a first class option to separate the rich and socially privileged from the masses, like airlines. Think of all the billions in federal subsidies given to Amtrak and regional services like LIRR, MetroNorth, SEPTA, WMATA, and NJT. For what?! To ease traffic gridlock and move people around affordably? Pshh. Don’t the poor people who use these systems know how to drive cars? Can’t they afford them? Why do our hard-earned tax dollars have to go to subsidizing public transportation at all? They should learn to hitch hike if they need to get from point A to point B.

You know who else liked trains? Joseph Stalin. He liked trains so much that he used prisoners to build a rail system that literally went no where. Is that really the kind of America we want to be living in?

Doesn’t Bernie know that Presidential candidates should only travel the country in private jets and limousines, where they’re removed from the germ-invested populous because they’re exceptional human beings chosen by God to rule the greatest country in the world? You’re never beholden to a train’s timetable in an armored Cadillac Escalade.

When will Bernie learn to do things right, like a REAL American?

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[H/T: Digg]